balletdancer19

 Ayo!
Wow I haven't posted on here since last june of 08. Holy shi! Anyways ALOT has changed! Last summer when I was posting I was on a major strict diet! I hate like 400ish cals daily and danced ballet, yoga, jazz and flamenco 8 hours monday through friday and then I'd go to the gym at night for a hour and had a math class at night which I Aced! I have no clue how I managed to do this!! It blows my mind! Well currently I am not dancing as much because my toe nails were falling off, I was wasting away and my body always hurt. My hips always grind now and my knees and ankles always collapse on me. I've gained 15 pound and look healthy but the ballet image haunts me EVERY SINGLE DAY! I still have major eating issue and chew and spit alot. grosss. I know I have a problem and am ashamed of it! I hope to recover and be normal one day. But it's really hard. I love feeling my bones on my chest and ribs. Its my favorite thing ever. 
I am in college right now and will be turing 20 in April. I am obsessed with what is in food, you ask me and Ill have an answer! Thanks for reading this loves!
Ill post again and sooner! Promise haha

So I havent had ballet class for a month and so I though i'd take this oppertunity to lose more weight. I have been eaten hardly anything and going to the gym everyday for 2 hours. My mom is noticing and keeps telling me I am looking to gaunt and I need to stop dieting but I am not thin enough. How to I hide this. She is driving me nuts! Advice???

CW: 125!!!
HW: 139ish..
GW: 115
5'8
age: 19